You know how we sort of use the term "called," loosely? Like this: "God called me to this place," or "I feel called to do such and such."
Well I've been wrestling with that lately, because I think it's hard to know if you're called some place or not. I really do. For me at least.
Last night I was having a conversation with someone about being called to a certain place, or to a group of people. And then a horrible
thought entered my mind.
Do you think God un-calls us if we are doing a bad job?
And I thought about that and cried about that and let it fester in my heart the way that everyone says you're not supposed to.
But my pal Adam cleared some stuff up for me. He explained that God knows what he is doing before we do (duh- but that was
something I think I had sort of forgotten.) And he reminded me that just because we may not stay forever in the same place we are
called to, that does not mean that we are being un-called. It means that God is calling us somewhere else. He said, "God doesn't work in a
backwards motion. He is always moving us forward." And I think he is right.
But as I struggle with knowing where I am supposed to be next year, I can't help but wish God would just plaster his plans for me on a
billboard or leave me a voicemail explaining every detail. But God doesn't speak to us that way, most of the time, does he? And partially,
I think that is because it causes us to seek him out more. I think part of the reason God is less clear than we would like in his plans for us is
because he knows that we are drawn to him by seeking out his words and his thoughts.
And for me, it's working. I'm not much closer to knowing where I am "called," for next year, exactly, but I was reading a little 2nd
Timothy this morning and came across this and thought, wow God, I see what you're doing there:
"..but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but
because of his on purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began.."
WHAT.
Help! I've found my calling! And it's a holy calling! And I don't know what that means! And why does God pick US for a holy calling?
These things I don't know. But really all I'm searching for these days is discernment to understand more of God. And here, I have gotten
a step closer. It may not be a direct answer to my present question of where the heck do I go, but it does teach me that I am called. And I
am given a holy calling, and so are all of us. And I'm praisin Jesus for that because if you really think about it, we're not really worth a
holy calling. We mess up and we're not even close to being as holy as we will be when we're dancin' in heaven before God, the holy of
holies.
BUT, God knows that. And he calls us anyway.
Well I've been wrestling with that lately, because I think it's hard to know if you're called some place or not. I really do. For me at least.
Last night I was having a conversation with someone about being called to a certain place, or to a group of people. And then a horrible
thought entered my mind.
Do you think God un-calls us if we are doing a bad job?
And I thought about that and cried about that and let it fester in my heart the way that everyone says you're not supposed to.
But my pal Adam cleared some stuff up for me. He explained that God knows what he is doing before we do (duh- but that was
something I think I had sort of forgotten.) And he reminded me that just because we may not stay forever in the same place we are
called to, that does not mean that we are being un-called. It means that God is calling us somewhere else. He said, "God doesn't work in a
backwards motion. He is always moving us forward." And I think he is right.
But as I struggle with knowing where I am supposed to be next year, I can't help but wish God would just plaster his plans for me on a
billboard or leave me a voicemail explaining every detail. But God doesn't speak to us that way, most of the time, does he? And partially,
I think that is because it causes us to seek him out more. I think part of the reason God is less clear than we would like in his plans for us is
because he knows that we are drawn to him by seeking out his words and his thoughts.
And for me, it's working. I'm not much closer to knowing where I am "called," for next year, exactly, but I was reading a little 2nd
Timothy this morning and came across this and thought, wow God, I see what you're doing there:
"..but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but
because of his on purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began.."
WHAT.
Help! I've found my calling! And it's a holy calling! And I don't know what that means! And why does God pick US for a holy calling?
These things I don't know. But really all I'm searching for these days is discernment to understand more of God. And here, I have gotten
a step closer. It may not be a direct answer to my present question of where the heck do I go, but it does teach me that I am called. And I
am given a holy calling, and so are all of us. And I'm praisin Jesus for that because if you really think about it, we're not really worth a
holy calling. We mess up and we're not even close to being as holy as we will be when we're dancin' in heaven before God, the holy of
holies.
BUT, God knows that. And he calls us anyway.
(ps- I know these are incoherent, rambled, and slightly confusing thoughts. But I don't think we have to be coherent all the time. Learning requires a little bit of disheveled-ness.)