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on creating

4/9/2015

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Hi there. It's been awhile, hasn't it? My sincerest apologies for that; I haven't been in a slump necessarily. I just haven't felt that I have enough to write about. But is that true at all? The answer is, truthfully, no. I do have things to write about. I have thoughts in my brain and things that I experience every day, struggles that remain silent, and prayers that need hearing. 

But I think the truth of the matter is that blogging really intimidates me. Not only is it an expression that essentially allows my voice, previously so secretly kept between my pen and paper, to be heard by anyone that wants, but also I'm so intimidated by other, better writers. Or people I think "do life" better than me, or people who's lives just seem so much fancier or more colorful or more full of decent things to talk about. Let me just acknowledge the fact that these are all utter lies. I know that. And the truth of the matter is, I have been a writer all my life. I have been a life-documenter all my life, from story writing in the third grade to disposable cameras in 5th, to my current 21 year old, journaling, photo taking, story telling self. Writing and blogging and creating is a very popular idea right now- which is wonderful. But it also presents a problem to self conscious people like me who think incredibly naive things like, "what can I really contribute to this big world? what are my words really going to do in the grand scheme of things? who is going to read them?" 

First of all, who the heck cares. Right? 

We don't write for others, unless we are writing a persuasive speech or a letter or something like that. 

We write for ourselves. I think we all know that. 

Second of all, the very fact that I, you, we, write, is a revelation in itself. We live in a world so driven to technology and success and left-brained thinking and "where am I going to make the most money?" But we write! We can write! We can document our lives and our thoughts and if they let us, other peoples' lives. And it's the most beautiful, empowering, creative thing that we have the privilege of entering into. So gosh darn it, I'm going to write, and not be afraid. I'm going to create, to believe that I can bring together beautiful words and that I can actually write a poem and that I don't suck because we write not to please others but to enjoy. To savor the life we are given. We write because it is in us. We create because we know a great Creator. So excuse me while I go check out a book of poetry from the library and switch my major back to English and continue to rave about how beautiful this world is because we can create! 

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    hello, friends.
    Picture
    my name is holland. 

    this is my blog.

    it's where I create. 

    it is the home of many jumbled thoughts and sentences.

    it's a place where you are invited to join me in my mission to see the beauty of this life and to live in response to it.

    welcome.

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